Best marriage joke ever 2021?
What is the best marriage joke ever?
Jack wakes up with a horrible hangover and a throbbing black eye. The first thing he sees is a single rose on the side table and a note from his wife: “Dear, breakfast is made. I’ve gone shopping to make you your favourite dinner tonight. I love you!”
He stumbles to the kitchen and, sure enough, there’s breakfast. “Joe,” he says to his son, “what happened last night?”
“You came home soused and got that black eye tripping over a chair.”
“So, why the rose, breakfast, and sweet note from your mother?”
“Oh, that. Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take off your clothes, you screamed, ‘Leave me alone, I’m married!’”
“How did your doctors appointment go today” Joe asked his wife. “Great honey” she said. “First the doctor asked me to take off all my clothes”. “What” Joe said?
First the doctor said what a nice body I had” “NO” joe said “Then he complemented me on my nice legs” Joe is alarmed but says nothing. He then said what nice breasts I had. Joe is steaming now. “Did he tell you what a fat ass you have” he said.
“No honey. He didn’t mention your name once!”
The bride's father was trying to marry off his daughter quickly because the doctors said she was a high risk of heart failure and probably would not last more than a year. They were married but the father felt guilty so he took the unsuspecting groom aside and said, “Son I have to tell you something about my daughter. She’s got acute angina.” The groom enthusiastically replied, “I know, sir, and a great set of tits too!”
I don’t think i quite told it right.
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